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Tuesday, November 30, 2004
Raya, digicam, fuckness, snipping off hair n the eye candy pri. sch mate.
i am like fucking fucked out. jalan raya for so many days. soo many freaking days dat im fucking tired n i fucking had a tiff with my bf bcuz of dat.
But juz now was worth it ar. haha. cant tell u why.. lets juz say u'll see it in the pics i will post later on. im not using digicam wat.. *surprise surprise* im like fucking saving the fucking money to buy a fucking digicam so dat i can take pics and see the result str8 away. why? cuz im fucking vain to the fucking core.
haha.
seriously, i went raya visiting with my primary sch mates who i have not seen face 2 face for SOOOOOOOOx3 long n all have grown! i mean. for the better, everyone looks better. except for me mebbe? heehee. and the plus point was dat ida was there so im not fucking bored. Yeay! Ida was like, SO funny siak. she likes to this weird faces and cracks everyone up. luckily suhaimi went off after my house. he's like sooooo 'no word to describe him n his behaviour'. den firdaus oso went wif him. ape seh.. den ridwan got some soccer training so he too had to go and fauziah n ridhwan went off. Total strength, 22, left 18. frm 18 down to 12. haha.. took lotsa pics. but hafta wait for it to develop first ar. broke siak. got 2 films seh. both oso 36 shots. pokai ar gini.
im thinking of snipping my hair off at a saloon tmr. i so, totally, hate my hair. i cant style it. so wish me luck dat it wun turn out ugly. i'll cut sumthink like andriana's hair. she said nice, so ok lorrr.. 8 bucks only.. so cheap eh? heehee...
i think i shall go and wash the 2nd film roll je ar.. cuz inside that film is today's outing pics n there's lotsa interesting pics dat i-hope-will-turn-out-nice-cuz--i-so-badly-wanna-see-n-frame it!! the 1st roll is mainly more of my raya visiting with shuqun mates. bah! that one nuthing quite interesting ar.
so long ppl. au revoir! bon voyage! i wanna go to dreamland n dream of my pri-sch-mate-turned-cute-n-yummy-eye-candy now. hee hee. heeheeeheeheeheheheehehehheeeheeheee
*giggling fit*
heeheeheeeheeeheeeheeeheee
*getting mentel distinctively*
part of this verse from a song is for 'him' ..
I woulda like one a these mornings,
to wake up and find your face on
a pillow lyin right next to mine.
I woulda cut out the partying,
the smoking and the rum
And buss a extra whine and mek we seed up a son.
Well every time I fantasize mi see your lips mi see your eyes
Yuh trigger finger do some tings dat leff the rudegyal hypnotized
For you it's just a thing,
just another little fling
But for me this is HEAVEN and the ANGEL DEM AH SING
heehee.. ok not all part of it.i think this mentel'ness n 'crushing' him is juz temporary. it shall die down in 1 days time. fret not.
But juz now was worth it ar. haha. cant tell u why.. lets juz say u'll see it in the pics i will post later on. im not using digicam wat.. *surprise surprise* im like fucking saving the fucking money to buy a fucking digicam so dat i can take pics and see the result str8 away. why? cuz im fucking vain to the fucking core.
haha.
seriously, i went raya visiting with my primary sch mates who i have not seen face 2 face for SOOOOOOOOx3 long n all have grown! i mean. for the better, everyone looks better. except for me mebbe? heehee. and the plus point was dat ida was there so im not fucking bored. Yeay! Ida was like, SO funny siak. she likes to this weird faces and cracks everyone up. luckily suhaimi went off after my house. he's like sooooo 'no word to describe him n his behaviour'. den firdaus oso went wif him. ape seh.. den ridwan got some soccer training so he too had to go and fauziah n ridhwan went off. Total strength, 22, left 18. frm 18 down to 12. haha.. took lotsa pics. but hafta wait for it to develop first ar. broke siak. got 2 films seh. both oso 36 shots. pokai ar gini.
im thinking of snipping my hair off at a saloon tmr. i so, totally, hate my hair. i cant style it. so wish me luck dat it wun turn out ugly. i'll cut sumthink like andriana's hair. she said nice, so ok lorrr.. 8 bucks only.. so cheap eh? heehee...
i think i shall go and wash the 2nd film roll je ar.. cuz inside that film is today's outing pics n there's lotsa interesting pics dat i-hope-will-turn-out-nice-cuz--i-so-badly-wanna-see-n-frame it!! the 1st roll is mainly more of my raya visiting with shuqun mates. bah! that one nuthing quite interesting ar.
so long ppl. au revoir! bon voyage! i wanna go to dreamland n dream of my pri-sch-mate-turned-cute-n-yummy-eye-candy now. hee hee. heeheeeheeheeheheheehehehheeeheeheee
*giggling fit*
heeheeheeeheeeheeeheeeheee
*getting mentel distinctively*
part of this verse from a song is for 'him' ..
I woulda like one a these mornings,
to wake up and find your face on
a pillow lyin right next to mine.
I woulda cut out the partying,
the smoking and the rum
And buss a extra whine and mek we seed up a son.
Well every time I fantasize mi see your lips mi see your eyes
Yuh trigger finger do some tings dat leff the rudegyal hypnotized
For you it's just a thing,
just another little fling
But for me this is HEAVEN and the ANGEL DEM AH SING
heehee.. ok not all part of it.i think this mentel'ness n 'crushing' him is juz temporary. it shall die down in 1 days time. fret not.
The white, burnt baju melayu
haha. when were at ryan's house, i acted goody two shoes n voluntereed to iron his baju melayu for him. cuz he wanna follow us all go raya visiting. den he said the-word-that-i-shall-not-mention-here n asks zilla for stick of ciggie frm me and bcuz of dat i was like sorta mad n i said, "I heard dat!" (for the word he used) n den i was like so busy talking i didnt realize dat the iron was on top of the shirt. i didnt move it away before talking.. den when i move the iron, to smooth the creases, the fabric juz tore. OMG. I M LIKE SO FREAKING FUCKED OUT. WAT IF HE SCOLDS ME? WAT IF HE HITS ME? WAT IF HE GETS SO FUCKED UP DAT HE'LL EMBARRASSED ME INFRONT OF EVERYONE?!
So i went to the kitchen n said nicely n put on my pitying look n said:
Me: "Ryan.. im so sorry, i burnt ur shirt."
I expected the worst frm him. budden, i was wrong. his reaction was so unexpected. he juz went disappointed n went inside the room n checks the burnt shirt n said,
Ryan: "Alah.... baju ni aku beli pakai duit aku sendiri tau.. aku tak byk baju melayu... aku mane suka pakai baju melayu nye orang.."
and den i panicked.
Me: "Ok la, aku kasi kau 2 stick ar? can?"
Ryan: "Tak nak ar. aku nak satu pack rokok."
Me: "Kk, boleh, lain kali aku belikan kau. but sorry eh, aku bakar baju kau."
HAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA... KESIAN SIAK.
That baju melayu is very nice siak. white colour. so nice, fabric so soft. skali, i go n ruin it. so fucksified.
So i went to the kitchen n said nicely n put on my pitying look n said:
Me: "Ryan.. im so sorry, i burnt ur shirt."
I expected the worst frm him. budden, i was wrong. his reaction was so unexpected. he juz went disappointed n went inside the room n checks the burnt shirt n said,
Ryan: "Alah.... baju ni aku beli pakai duit aku sendiri tau.. aku tak byk baju melayu... aku mane suka pakai baju melayu nye orang.."
and den i panicked.
Me: "Ok la, aku kasi kau 2 stick ar? can?"
Ryan: "Tak nak ar. aku nak satu pack rokok."
Me: "Kk, boleh, lain kali aku belikan kau. but sorry eh, aku bakar baju kau."
HAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA... KESIAN SIAK.
That baju melayu is very nice siak. white colour. so nice, fabric so soft. skali, i go n ruin it. so fucksified.
Sunday, November 28, 2004
Choosing baby's name
if i ever have a child. a baby boy. i'm gonna name him Mohd. Taufik Bin Whoever-my-husband-is
nice? hahaha..
nice? hahaha..
Saturday, November 27, 2004
Taufik Fever
It is so friggin hot in here. wahaha.. or maybe it is juz me? im down with fever. taufik fever. love dis skin?
go here n download it!
click here ----> http://blogskins.com/info.php?sid=25680
go here n download it!
click here ----> http://blogskins.com/info.php?sid=25680
sitting here watching the video and reminiscing
i'm still in love with you boy..
Thursday, November 25, 2004
no, im not the one who's sexy
dis is gonna be my temporary skin for the time being. this is also the oh-so-controversial 'im too sexy for this blog' skin at blogskins dat i made. i had lotsa feedbacks frm ppl wanting to see it. so here it is ppl. enjOy it while it lasts... u wan it? tag me ur blog url.
Wednesday, November 24, 2004
sore
im so tired. i've gone jln raye for so many days and my feet are sore. my relationship is rocky. and i feel caught up in the middle. abt everything. my parents simply won't understand that teenage life in the yr 2000++++ is diff. den 19**++.. i admit dat my parents are conservative but, pls, dis is my teengae life im talking abt. im not gonna look back 10 yrs down the road when im 26 and felt sore and regretful dat i didnt enjOy my adolescent life to the fullest. the max. the extreme. damn.
Hiphopfest
check that out at beats-society.blogspot.com
Tuesday, November 23, 2004
Kissing You
Pride can stand a thousand trials,
the strong will never fall
But watching stars without you,
my soul cried.
Heaving heart is full of pain,
oh, oh, the aching.
'Cause I'm kissing you, oh.
I'm kissing you, oh.
Touch me deep, pure and true,
gift to me forever
'Cause I'm kissing you, oh.
I'm kissing you, oh.
Where are you now?
Where are you now?
'Cause I'm kissing you.
I'm kissing you, oh.
the strong will never fall
But watching stars without you,
my soul cried.
Heaving heart is full of pain,
oh, oh, the aching.
'Cause I'm kissing you, oh.
I'm kissing you, oh.
Touch me deep, pure and true,
gift to me forever
'Cause I'm kissing you, oh.
I'm kissing you, oh.
Where are you now?
Where are you now?
'Cause I'm kissing you.
I'm kissing you, oh.
Silent nite
why does it seem so eerily silent tonite? usually there'll be motorbikes revving up their engine when they ride past my flat or.... chatters of late nite clubbers etc.. etc.. y tonite so silent? i mean the whole atmosphere... n im getting goosebumps n chills down my spine. urgh. i hate thinking abt it..
Tuesday, November 16, 2004
Interesting aidilfitri
juz got back frm kampong yesterday evening. and den when out to town. shOp here n there. biase lah, dpt duit collection~ haha.. i converted the malaysian ringgit to singapore dollars and shop till my hearts content! haha. at kampong i tried riding a motorbike. wahahahaha... nice feeling mahn! th ewind blowing in my hair.. etc etc. oh ya, reason being i wasnt wearing a helmet la. of coz. ride quite far oso ar.. hahaha.. first time try, so expert already eh? hahaha..
i chatted with ainie last nite frm 12++am to 7am in the morning siak. my eyes are so baggy n panda-like. n my stomach hurts. n my throat hurts like mad. from wat? FROM LAUGHING! *LoL* gossip2 ngn ainie, making stupid jOkes abt ppl etc. ahahhaha....
n den we talk abt opening a club together tau, it's supposed to be a jOke only us 2 understand and it'll be quite long to explain the whole story ar, and den its freakin' funny siak the ideas. hahaha. n den we planned to open the club at sheda's house la. HAHAHHAHAHAHA. like, sheda's flat is only 4 storey's high u know, and den, the idea was the whole building tu, me and aini bought it and make it like a club place. but den other units we won't disturb ar. kirakan the club is only at the 4th floor at sheda's unit ar. the funny thing is, the name of the club is 'LONG'S PS' Stands for Long's police station. Kirakan nak ikut mcm Mdm Wong's gitu ar, pronounce long as in the malay version ar... not the english one. kononnye, kita bukak club, club dah maju, kite jual rokok plak name 'LONG's'. den we kasi free mase nak launching rokok tu. every clubber gets 2 stick inside a cigg. case. abe got 1 room for smoking sheesha. 1 room for karaoke. 1 room for HR DPEARTMENT. 1 room for cheap sex. 1 entry, $20. not with us la! with whoever they want to bring inside the room ar.
On mondays, closed. Tuesday 'sOdomize nite'. hahaha... go check the meaning of the word sodomize ar.. hahahahahhahahahah. in other words, 'sOdomize nite' is for dangdut nite. tuesdays is for techno, wednesday is for 'men's nite'. every week got diff. function house. diff. themes ar.. got nurses week ar, where all our girls dresses in nurse outfits. but for each mth, the last week of the mth is the 'police station' theme. hahahahaha.. that is the jOke ar. very lazy to explain the whole story. thursdays, fridays, saturdays is ladies nite, sunday is reggae nite. ahhahahahaha. and den, age limit, 17. bcuz we remembered how hard n frustrating it is for us 17's `uns to get into clubs and den wen got raids all kan chiong. so we make the age limit 17. so they oso can celebrate sweet seventeen dere. at our club. AHHAHAHAHA... we play rnb n hiphop n the top 40's ar..
my jOb is at the etrance. collect money and chop/tag the hand. hahaha... bouncer is stands at first floor staircase. all the workers at my club is all the ppl frm shuqun ar. hahahaha.. funny siak. funny.. hahaha.. i cannot reveal the jOke cuz its very rude and.... rude ar.. not suitable for reading ar. hahahahhaa sorrie to bring u guys so far den leave u at the cliffhanger.
i chatted with ainie last nite frm 12++am to 7am in the morning siak. my eyes are so baggy n panda-like. n my stomach hurts. n my throat hurts like mad. from wat? FROM LAUGHING! *LoL* gossip2 ngn ainie, making stupid jOkes abt ppl etc. ahahhaha....
n den we talk abt opening a club together tau, it's supposed to be a jOke only us 2 understand and it'll be quite long to explain the whole story ar, and den its freakin' funny siak the ideas. hahaha. n den we planned to open the club at sheda's house la. HAHAHHAHAHAHA. like, sheda's flat is only 4 storey's high u know, and den, the idea was the whole building tu, me and aini bought it and make it like a club place. but den other units we won't disturb ar. kirakan the club is only at the 4th floor at sheda's unit ar. the funny thing is, the name of the club is 'LONG'S PS' Stands for Long's police station. Kirakan nak ikut mcm Mdm Wong's gitu ar, pronounce long as in the malay version ar... not the english one. kononnye, kita bukak club, club dah maju, kite jual rokok plak name 'LONG's'. den we kasi free mase nak launching rokok tu. every clubber gets 2 stick inside a cigg. case. abe got 1 room for smoking sheesha. 1 room for karaoke. 1 room for HR DPEARTMENT. 1 room for cheap sex. 1 entry, $20. not with us la! with whoever they want to bring inside the room ar.
On mondays, closed. Tuesday 'sOdomize nite'. hahaha... go check the meaning of the word sodomize ar.. hahahahahhahahahah. in other words, 'sOdomize nite' is for dangdut nite. tuesdays is for techno, wednesday is for 'men's nite'. every week got diff. function house. diff. themes ar.. got nurses week ar, where all our girls dresses in nurse outfits. but for each mth, the last week of the mth is the 'police station' theme. hahahahaha.. that is the jOke ar. very lazy to explain the whole story. thursdays, fridays, saturdays is ladies nite, sunday is reggae nite. ahhahahahaha. and den, age limit, 17. bcuz we remembered how hard n frustrating it is for us 17's `uns to get into clubs and den wen got raids all kan chiong. so we make the age limit 17. so they oso can celebrate sweet seventeen dere. at our club. AHHAHAHAHA... we play rnb n hiphop n the top 40's ar..
my jOb is at the etrance. collect money and chop/tag the hand. hahaha... bouncer is stands at first floor staircase. all the workers at my club is all the ppl frm shuqun ar. hahahaha.. funny siak. funny.. hahaha.. i cannot reveal the jOke cuz its very rude and.... rude ar.. not suitable for reading ar. hahahahhaa sorrie to bring u guys so far den leave u at the cliffhanger.
Sunday, November 14, 2004
End Of Transmission
selamat hari raya aidlifitri. maafkan segala salah silap saya. terlanjur bahasa. termaki. terkurang ajar. tertenking. tersepak. tercurik. terkutuk. terlanchowey. halalkan makan minum, dan segala rOkOk yg diisap. ataupon dicuri. haha. k bye all. i may not be blogging for sum time. but i'll b checking out this site now n then.
-end of transmission-
-end of transmission-
Friday, November 12, 2004
To err is human, to forgive divine
sleepless in jurong. i realize that there's lots of stars whenever it is nearing syawal.back in 2000, i was leaning on the parapet at my balcony at ol nanna's kampong house and i saw different patterns of stars. some were bright and huge and blinking rapidly, while others are distant. i remember seeing a very peculiar shaped, line of stars. and tonight, i saw it again. the same peculiar line of stars. 3 stars, bright and huge in a diagonal line. maybe that star belongs to me? i've heard of ppl adopting stars and naming it after someone they love. maybe they're mine.. maybe they're mine....
i dunno why i'm submitting a melancholic and metaphoric entry. i guess its just that same sappy feeling of lost of the ones u love, u feel everytime its nearing hari raya. i have to accept that every one that lives must die. i have to accept that 1 day, some day, someday far away from now, i am also going to celebrate syawal without my loved ones. accepting that is as hard as staring at the sun with my eyes, bare, wide and open. sometimes im afraid to love somebody so much as im afraid i will break down and lose myself when i lost that somebody. but how could you not love the group of ppl that you were born into? it hurts me to know, and to accept the fact that the ppl i love ard me now will one day die. leaving me. cold, lonely and confused.
take a minute. and pause after reading this. close your eyes and let your mind wonder to flashes of still images to the happy faces to of all your loved ones. the parents who gave you life and who would take a bullet for you, the siblings who will never say 'i love you' even though they mean to. the grandparents who is slowly wilting physically n mentally but brightens up upon seeing your cheerfulness and hearing your laughters.
cherish them while they're still around. do not take them for granted. do not wait till its too late. i know everyone has different temperaments. but learn to keep it low. keep it cool. its no use getting all worked up and angry. this is all satan's play. channel your anger to something else, and forgive and forget. life is too short to stay mad at anybody.
apologize if you have to. do not wait till you have to say so to the grave. it'll all be too late.
i dunno why i'm submitting a melancholic and metaphoric entry. i guess its just that same sappy feeling of lost of the ones u love, u feel everytime its nearing hari raya. i have to accept that every one that lives must die. i have to accept that 1 day, some day, someday far away from now, i am also going to celebrate syawal without my loved ones. accepting that is as hard as staring at the sun with my eyes, bare, wide and open. sometimes im afraid to love somebody so much as im afraid i will break down and lose myself when i lost that somebody. but how could you not love the group of ppl that you were born into? it hurts me to know, and to accept the fact that the ppl i love ard me now will one day die. leaving me. cold, lonely and confused.
take a minute. and pause after reading this. close your eyes and let your mind wonder to flashes of still images to the happy faces to of all your loved ones. the parents who gave you life and who would take a bullet for you, the siblings who will never say 'i love you' even though they mean to. the grandparents who is slowly wilting physically n mentally but brightens up upon seeing your cheerfulness and hearing your laughters.
cherish them while they're still around. do not take them for granted. do not wait till its too late. i know everyone has different temperaments. but learn to keep it low. keep it cool. its no use getting all worked up and angry. this is all satan's play. channel your anger to something else, and forgive and forget. life is too short to stay mad at anybody.
apologize if you have to. do not wait till you have to say so to the grave. it'll all be too late.
Monday, November 08, 2004
Im back.
hmmm.. in feeling all crampy frm this cramps. i juz hate 'that time of the month'. sakit siak perOt.haven't been updating dat much cuz, well, im bz. with life. haha. *surprise* *surprise*. i have a life now, mind you. hahaha. have not been submitting skins anymore lately. ran outta ideas.
im sooo bz preparing for aidilfitri. bake cookies, bake cake. wah lau... tiring siak.. run here, run there. im surprised i haven't lose any weight yet. dayUm! mebbe i ate twice the amount that i shed? hahaha.. glutton me.
Daddy so nice... gimme 50 bucks to buy new pair of pants or anything dat i want. wOowEeeeeeeeeeee~~~~~~
But i kinda miss shida n dd n attica u knO? oh. no. i dun mean dd. juz shida n attica. attica dunno where she go. i think she's leading her own life la. shida? gOne with the wind. skejap ade. skejap takde. she didnt even call me thru the whole ramadhan. its nuthing, no biggie. juz dat, missed those times. u kno? usually every puasa we'll be up doing crazy things. abe dis yr, semua berpecah. bOohOo.. *sOb* *sOb* saw selina the other day infront of my sister's house, lOoking gOod! my sis said she look like a dOll. yes she does. i oso miss hangin' out wif her n her cuzz. art. argh. those were the days.
juz bcuz of 1 mistake. everything's changed.
and dats life. everything change. everybody's changing.
im sooo bz preparing for aidilfitri. bake cookies, bake cake. wah lau... tiring siak.. run here, run there. im surprised i haven't lose any weight yet. dayUm! mebbe i ate twice the amount that i shed? hahaha.. glutton me.
Daddy so nice... gimme 50 bucks to buy new pair of pants or anything dat i want. wOowEeeeeeeeeeee~~~~~~
But i kinda miss shida n dd n attica u knO? oh. no. i dun mean dd. juz shida n attica. attica dunno where she go. i think she's leading her own life la. shida? gOne with the wind. skejap ade. skejap takde. she didnt even call me thru the whole ramadhan. its nuthing, no biggie. juz dat, missed those times. u kno? usually every puasa we'll be up doing crazy things. abe dis yr, semua berpecah. bOohOo.. *sOb* *sOb* saw selina the other day infront of my sister's house, lOoking gOod! my sis said she look like a dOll. yes she does. i oso miss hangin' out wif her n her cuzz. art. argh. those were the days.
juz bcuz of 1 mistake. everything's changed.
and dats life. everything change. everybody's changing.